Scared of Breaking Up

What to do? What to do?...

Ending a relationship is a big decision and it is especially difficult when the couple has been together for an extended period of time or has merged finances or possessions, or, in some cases, have children involved.

The break up of a relationship does not imply that there is something wrong with you or even the person that you've been with. It simply means that for some reason or another, the relationship is not working, and rather than giving something to you, it could potentially be draining you emotionally, especially if you've been unhappy for a while.

There are many reasons why relationships fail. The important thing is to really think about what these reasons are in your own relationship. Do your problems have solutions? If so, brainstorm with your partner about possible resolutions. If you seemingly cannot agree on anything, then perhaps it is another indication that it is time to move on.

Take time to think and ask yourself important questions about what you're feeling and the nature of your relationship. What are your intentions in continuing this relationship? Do you and your partner have the same intentions in the relationship? If your intentions differ, can you live with their views and expectations of what a happy relationship is?.

The important thing is that you feel comfortable and happy with whatever decision you make. Breaking up may be difficult, but there is a huge possibility of potentially causing further damage and pain by maintaining an unhappy relationship. Building more resentment between the two people involved can have long-lasting effects and negative impacts, especially if the couple do have children.

If you do choose to break up, remember to surround yourself with good friends. You had a life before you entered this relationship, so try to remember what elements made up that life. Also, be happy that you've made a choice for yourself, something that many people have difficulty with. Congratulate yourself on the things that you learned in your "failed" relationship and remember that just because it didn't work out with this person, doesn't mean that you are a failure at all relationships. Learn from your past, internalize this knowledge, and move on so you can use what you know to create a more effective, satisfying relationship with someone else.